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DBD Transcript 7.22.15

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Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:05 pm
Hello Everyone

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:06 pm
Hello

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:06 pm
Welcome to our Support Circle Chat Forum, would you care to share your story?

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:09 pm
This is my first session – not sure

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:09 pm
Ok, I have an adorable 12 year old Golden Retriever, Lucky

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:10 pm
He has lymphoma, he has been battling his cancer for 29 months, but we are recently having multiple challenges…

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:10 pm
What kind of animal do you support and care for?

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:11 pm
Well, I just had to say goodbye to Puppy…he was 13 1/2 and was diagnosed with Hemangiosarcoma in July 2014

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:12 pm
I am soooo sorry… I know how hard this is as we are facing it too

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:12 pm
what breed was Puppy? (I like that name, it’s sweet)

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:12 pm
He was a Lhasa Apsa. I am so sad – I just don’t know what to do

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:13 pm
I can appreciate the sadness, grief takes it own course and it’s own time

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:14 pm
I have been feeling very sad and anxious especially these last few weeks myself as Lucky has had some marked declines (he developed pneumonia)

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:15 pm
For me, it help to share my story and talk it out, would you care to share about Puppy? He was diagnosed in 2014, did you raise him from a pup?

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:16 pm
29 months is a long battle – *** Bless him. I was told Puppy would die very shortly after he was diagnosed and we did everything – chemo and surgery etc. He just died on July 4. You are doing a great job with Lucky – sorry Im so slow here

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:16 pm
No one types slow….. I just type hyper fast

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:17 pm
ha ha – you made me laugh – thats a good thing. I understand the anxiety of the process

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:17 pm
Yea, these cancer’s usually take our babies quickly: Lucky was supposed to survive 8-12 weeks, but *** has Blessed us with a lot of time (It doesn’t make it easier)

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:18 pm
So true – every day is a blessing but when it happens its like nothing else.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:18 pm
We too did chemo (and were currently in a round a treatments when he developed the pneumonia) currently we are at a stop for everything

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:18 pm
absolutely

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:19 pm
We had 2 Goldens (brothers) and the other developed this same disease and passed after a ten week battle

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:19 pm
It’s been nearly two years and I still have “those moments”

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:20 pm
Oh MY!! Lucky is your miracle boy. The chemo sets the stage for opportunistic infections.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:20 pm
Puppy had 12 months with you too… you also beat the odds

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:21 pm
I guess in some way we know what the future will bring and we can cherish each day extra specially, but there is never enough time

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:21 pm
We did beat the odds. We called him our miracle boy and even when the chemo made him so sick he rebound.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:21 pm
AMEN…. when we discovered the pneumonia, it actually hit me for REAL that we are not going to “beat” this

Guest_216

July 22, 2015 – 6:22 pm
hi – just stopping in for a few minutes – they are all miracles aren’t they?

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:22 pm
When it happened with Pup, it happened so fast, and i wasnt ready even though i thought i was prepared.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:22 pm
Lucky rebounded too except three weeks ago, it took him down and that’s how the pneumonia set up

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:22 pm
Hello 216! Welcome!

Janice

July 22, 2015 – 6:23 pm
thanks – i’ve been here before but love reading everyone’s journeys

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:23 pm
Hey Janice, good to see you again

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:23 pm
We were discussing beating the odds and how for all the time we get, it’s still never enough

Janice

July 22, 2015 – 6:24 pm
thanks – my little one is doing ok right now – on fluids every day right now but seems to be feeling better thank *** in my prayers – she is so precious – i was reading a post from someone about wanting to do the right thing – and it’s so hard to know – she is my heart and soul

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:24 pm
MDM, I get that, can we ever really be prepared?

Janice

July 22, 2015 – 6:25 pm
no – indeed we cannot – we take each and every precious moment

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:25 pm
I dont seem to be able to wrap my mind around this

Janice

July 22, 2015 – 6:25 pm
it’s so hard i understand

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:26 pm
indeed Janice, we were discussing that at home: how do we really know for sure? With Lucky he has so many challenges/complications and so many variables that knowing what causes what and what is best is like nailing jello to the wall

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:27 pm
MDM, you don’t have to wrap your head around it, right now, let yourself grieve, be good to yourself, you gave him everything anyone could ever want… He was loved and he loved you back

Janice

July 22, 2015 – 6:28 pm
i know so much how you feel – one vet told me something that to this day really helps me – he said that all we can do is make the best decisions for them that we can and never second guess those decisions – we don’t have crystal ***** and cannot predict the future for your little one or for himself – this amazing vet died in a tragic bike accident less than three months later and i have his email

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:29 pm
Oh Janice, what a grand thought! Thank you for sharing it! (sorry this vet passed so tragically)

Janice

July 22, 2015 – 6:30 pm
indeed – he was truly a gift from *** – it helps me when I find myself second guessing myself with her care and making trips to the vet and giving meds and more meds – I do what my heart tells me and love her….

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:30 pm
another AMEN

Janice

July 22, 2015 – 6:31 pm
i have to sign off – bless you all and you and your little ones are all in my prayers with my own little one xx00

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:32 pm
Thanks Janice, Good night~ and Blessings to you too!

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:33 pm
I feel so much grief I can not even look at pictures because I get hysterical. Everyone says its going to take a long time. I keep second guessing myself and try not to – but I miss him so much

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:34 pm
Did I become disconnected to the group

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:35 pm
Don’t push yourself, MDM, be gentle and kind to yourself, this is not easy: we spend all our time and efforts trying to “fix” what we know we can’t, and love them until our own hearts break. This isn’t easy but again, Puppy knew how deeply he was loved and he will be with you always in your heart and mind

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:36 pm
there are no magic words (I wish I had some for sure!)… feeling the emotions is very hard, but allow yourself to feel but if I may offer: try to remember as many good as you feel the sad

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:37 pm
Thank you. It’s just so permanent. Im sorry to be negative. This is so good that you are on this chat while you are caring for Lucky.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:38 pm
You are no more negative than I feel, believe me, I am happy to share… I can’t say it any other way: this simply stinks

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:39 pm
Yes!

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:39 pm
It hurts, and no one can “fix” it, we have tried, cancer has no cure “yet”

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:39 pm
I find myself wanting to scream at the walls, but that doesn’t change it either (I still scream at them though)

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:40 pm
Unfortunately! I hate cancer. I just lost my Mom in December. The sense of loss we have as humans is crazy.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:41 pm
I couldn’t agree more, it’s a blessing and a curse

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:41 pm
we get to feel amazing highs and love through our babies and the loss is the opposite side of that pendulum

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:42 pm
When Puppy died I created a web site for him with pictures and tag lines and I wrote an email to my close family and friends about him and a story of how we first came to be. I also wrote a letter to him and read it to him at his service to help me process some of this

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:43 pm
oh how awesome…I have recently been think about a eulogy for Lucky myself…

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:43 pm
I keep hearing certain song lyrics that make me smile and that describe him

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:44 pm
I really like the idea of your writing him a letter, sharing your heart with him

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:45 pm
I do the same thing with the song lyrics!!! We were scheduled to take a family vacation to Bermuda on a cruise the week he died. We couldnt take him but I decided to have him cremated and I took some of him and sprinkled it on the beach because he loved the beach.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:45 pm
I really like that thought

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:45 pm
I also struggled with the cremation vs burial.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:46 pm
When Lucky does pass i am going to mix some of his ashes with Teddy’s (our other Golden) and sprinkle them together

somewhere

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:46 pm
I preferred cremation… I wanted the “boys” with me not alone but that’s just me

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:46 pm
I have never had a pet before who was my child and I didn’t know what was right

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:47 pm
I am not sure there is a right/wrong

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:47 pm
I think it is what you want…what brings you peace

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:47 pm
Puppy knew you loved him and trusted you

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:48 pm
I cried about the cremation but in the end I decided I wanted him with me and I will have him buried with me. That gives me a sense of peace to know that I will have him beside me for eternity.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:48 pm
so now its about making you feel more comfortable

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:48 pm
exactly

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:49 pm
Yes, I didnt want him to ever be alone like you said

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:49 pm
yup yup yup

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:50 pm
I feel like Ive been in overdrive since it happened with all the things you have to do to bring about completion. Now that Im home reality is setting in and it is hard

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:50 pm
I want him and Teddy with me, we spent all these years together in life

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:51 pm
reality also stinks as bad as cancer at least in this instance

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:51 pm
Are the boys your only pets?

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:51 pm
Yes and no: the two Goldens were brothers and at that time our only ones

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:51 pm
Once Teddy passed we bought Lucky a puppy

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:52 pm
and then the puppy a puppy

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:52 pm
so currently I have Lucky and two 2 year olds

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:52 pm
it’s a bit of a zoo some days

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:52 pm
but I love my zoo

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:52 pm
MDM, if I may ask: have you joined the Yahoo online group? There are a LOT of great people there that can also help you talk out your journey and help support you through this trying time

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:52 pm
They miss each other when they are gone I bet

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:53 pm
No I haven’t heard about the yahoo. Whats the site?

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:53 pm
The pups are pretty resilient: Plato thinks he never gets enough attention and Tucker only cares of you throw the ball, throw the ball, throw the ball

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:54 pm
I hope the link works:

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:54 pm
Here’s the link: Day By Day Pet Caregiver Yahoo Group

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:54 pm
if it doesn’t work (as I am not much of a computer person) you can also email daybydaypetsupport-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:55 pm
My internet service is super slow tonight but I saved the link info. Thank you so much for the conversation.

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:55 pm
it has been my pleasure

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:55 pm
I hope I was able to offer you some solace

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:56 pm
I wish you the very best on your journey. And yes, you helped me stop crying for a while. I thank you!!

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:56 pm
Please just try and be patient with yourself

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:56 pm
have a nice night

Guest_540 MDM

July 22, 2015 – 6:57 pm
ok I will try. You have a nice night too! farewell

Suzanne

July 22, 2015 – 6:57 pm
G’night